Wednesday, August 14, 2013

What You Do When You're Old

Oh, it's all nakedly hair-free when you're staring in the bathroom mirror, tweezer in hand, but the very second you're in a public place, like your car in the Wal-Mart parking lot, WHAP, there's a forest of barb-wire-things sprouting from your chin.

It must be stray food that makes those hairs grow so fast. Spilled coffee raises the alkalinity of the chin soil, I understand.

Anyway, you grab the tweezers that are stashed in the console, for just such an occasion (when you're younger, it's lip gloss and rubbers that are hidden there; when you're 52, it's tweezers and slight-urine-loss-mini-pads). You flip down the driver's mirror and start searching for the offending hair, which crawled back up its follicle the moment the tweezers came to light, when something catches your eye.

You look to your right and there, in the car next to you, is another woman plucking hairs off HER chin.

Is this what happens to us all when we hit 50? We hang out in Wal-Mart parking lots plucking our chins?

I'd raise my chin and try not to worry about such things, but I'm afraid I might poke my eye out.

16 comments:

  1. Aaaargh.
    And it reminds me of a dreadful joke which I am ashamed to say makes me laugh.
    'Where do flies go in winter?'
    'They hide in old men's noses - you know because you can see their legs hanging down...'

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  2. You'll have to get yourself one of those No NO's you see advertised on TV. I haven't had the chin hair problem yet and I'm a good many years older than you so I guess it's not really an age related thing...I DO however have those devils horns in my eyebrows. Oh well. I've convinced myself they're interesting looking.

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    Replies
    1. Devil's horns! HA! Dave has those things, too. I'm forever having to pluck out these giant hairs from his eyebrows! Lucky you, though, with a hairless chin!

      I've heard mixed reviews on the no-nos. Some swear by them; some say they're a waste of money. Because they're so expensive, I'm not quite ready to give them a go.

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  3. So Cathy...as I read the first sentence I thought we were talking about bikini line and I was like, really, hair free? How does she do that?? I want the secret!!

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    Replies
    1. Er... bikini line? I haven't worn a bikini since the 70s...

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  4. Oh dear...

    Well there's always a barb wire sort of hairy forest sprouting from my chin, but that's deliberate...

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    Replies
    1. Maybe I should stop tweezing and start shaping?

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  5. As a guy, I'm proud that at almost fifty I can sprout facial hair! Yes, I come from a long line of hairless men...

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    Replies
    1. I can't believe you're that old... I always think of you as 25.

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  6. Oh hell girl I've been mowing my chin regularly since 2002. What's up with that?!?! I'm constantly in the bathroom tweezing them out too. I've just taken to using a razor in the shower and it hasn't been a problem. I just do it every morning and only have to tweeze a couple later in the day.

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  7. Chin soil? Ha ha!

    I have one blond hair on my right cheek that's really fine, so I don't notice it until it grows to two or three inches and flops around my face. XD

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    Replies
    1. Pffffft!!!!! You're WAY too young for obnoxious facial hair - although you ARE pregnant and full of raging hormones, so it might be true... *passes you my tweezers*

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  8. I used to do it while waiting for the school bus in the morning. And I was only 36...

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    Replies
    1. Wot? You were still riding the school bus at 36? :)

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