The Amazing Smoking Toddler

So here's the thing – this kid looks GOOD smoking.

He's got the style thing down pat. The sexy exhale. The pursed lips.
The steam-throw-blow-out that says, "Hey, I got something important to say, so listen up."

But he's TWO.

How much can he possibly say? 

"Yeah, I always wondered what Godot was waiting for... and now I know - it's a fresh set of Huggies."

Or, "Bring me another round of breastmilk, Big Mama, I got me a hankering for some fresh moo juice and ya know it's better for me than Enfalac ... not that I really care, I'm gonna have cancer by the time I'm in preschool ... hey, who's got a light?"

I want to see this kid when he's 20, all wrinkled up and diseased and sallow, coughing up a yard of phlegm, smelling like an old man's underpants.

Still, as an ex-smoker, I gotta admit, I get a bad case of the Jones just looking at this kid.

I wonder if he'd let me have a drag.

Just one.

I wouldn't get the filter all smarmy, I promise.

C'mon ... no one will know...

I'll slip ya a ten-spot ya dirty bugger.

P.S. - I had the video posted here but, as Alan sez, the "evil ones" took it down. The kid doesn't look quite as suave in this shot.