Monday, September 13, 2010

Fear & Loathing in Magnetawan

Today I started following an interesting blog.
"Dick Smith for Mayor ... NOT!" is as bizarre a website as I've ever seen, and I've seen plenty. Not bizarre as in girls in bikinis and wild monkeys, but bizarre in terms of its complete and utter political incorrectness.
How many times have you wished politicians would just stop talking in riddles and say what's on their minds?
Well, the owner of this blog, Tony Pratas, does just that.
You should read some of the stuff on this blog - it's stuff I don't even want to repeat for fear of getting sued. I would be surprised if there wasn't already a lawsuit in the works - the content is that incendiary.
Still, I really, really want to.
It's kind of, um, funny.
No, no - to be honest, it's just about the funniest thing on the internet. You should go look at it now before some lawyer shuts it down.
This is what it's about: Mr. Pratas is currently a Councillor for the Municipality of Magnetawan. Dick Smith is currently the Mayor of Magnetawan. Mr. Pratas wants Mr. Smith's job and he's going after it like killer bees after stolen honey. 
Mr. Smith's tenure as Mayor has been fraught with controversy; so much so that many people were surprised when he announced he'd be running again.
Magnetawan, it should be noted, is such a small town that I don't think it even qualifies as a small town. It's more of a village, a tiny, scenic crossroads on the banks of the Magnetawan River. It boasts a fine restaurant where I've enjoyed many a tasty meal (they put mustard smiley faces on their hamburgers) some pretty scenery; and some of the most blood-spattered, eye-gouging, gut-punching politicking this side of Buffalo. I mean you see this kind of thing on American TV commercials all the time, but you generally never see it in our neck of the woods. Especially not in tiny wee towns like Magnetawan.
OK, so maybe it goes on in the backrooms and the bedrooms. But certainly not online.
The author of the blog has another blog, aptly called Tony Pratas for Mayor. It's a little bit prettier than the Smith blog, but certainly not as funny. It lacks that rednecked zeal that the Smith one has.
By the way, I've got seven famous fictional mayors on this page - see if you can tell me who they all are -WITHOUT CHEATING! 
We're running an honest campaign here; besides, you know what happens to cheaters...


  1. My husband reads his stuff! I can hear him laughing throughout the house, actually more like howling.

    And I have no idea about the mayors. I do know I like a good quarter pounder every once and awhile.

  2. We had a small town down here that was doing things like this. The US government set up a sting and now the mayor and half the city counsel are all serving jail sentences.

  3. Sounds like it's just a matter of time until "the long arm of the law" grasps this guy by the scruff of the neck.

  4. Hey! I've been to Magnetawan! Who knew such a pretty little place was so...backstabby. Ottawa move over.

    Hmmm, the mayors. I recognize Mayor Quimby, and the mayor of gothem city (does he have a name?) And that looks like the Penguin. Maybe.

  5. John - ya never know with Solender.
    Joann - and who doesn't, although I'm partial to the Big Mac sauce. I could just eat that stuff on a sandwich.
    Pamela Jo - Ya probably can't believe everything on this guy's blog, but then again, there probably is something to what he claims. Which makes me wonder how a local government, any local gov't, that is supposed to be transparent gets away with this kind of stuff. I suppose the smaller the community, the easier it is to be ignored by the rest of the world.
    Alan - did you see the Hitler video? That alone is worth the price of admission.
    Laurita - You are SUCH a Muskoka chick! You are probably one of only 10 people in the world who can say they've been to Magnetaway. OK, maybe 15 people. And their dogs. OK, OK, maybe a couple of thousand. IN THE WORLD! Yeah, I think Ottawa seems pretty clean cut all of a sudden. And, yup, you're right on Quimby, Gotham and the Penguin. So far you're in the lead!

  6. Yeah, Cathy. I watched the video. Wits here used the same clip to poke fun at the proposed highrise developement down by the harbour. I thought all of the hitler vids were removed from YouTube by the movie's producers? Oh yeah, I only recognize Mayor McCheese...politics isn't my thing...

  7. Get a load of this guy:

    Yeah, the comics are OK, but read his posts.

  8. Wow! I went to the blog and noticed you're his only follower. LOL

    I also noticed the title at the top, which includes a statement that reads "He has allowed thugs and fools to manage our community". This makes me laugh also since I do not associate 'thugs' with small towns as you described.

    The other thing is that every post appears to be in all caps, I cannot help but read it as if he were yelling at me. Should be interesting to see how long the blog stays up. I think i might go get a burger for lunch and request a mustard smiley on it, just so you know. :D

  9. Alan - ya can't keep a bad You Tube down.
    Mark - what is UP with this comic guy? I don't know whether to be afraid of him or get him some psychiatric help...
    HulaBuns - oh, I hope you enjoyed that smiley burger. It just makes you happy to eat something that smiles on the way by.

  10. Dick Smith for Mayor .. NOT!

    I am not in favour of bad campaigning however, it is only defamation if it is not true.

    We have had 4 terrible years with Smith and he thumbed his nose at all of the citizens because we had no way of getting rid of him. On election day, NOW WE DO!

    Angry Citizen in Magnetawan

  11. I have known Dick Smith for many years and he is one of the kindest, most pricipaled men I have known. I do not feel that Magnetewan deserves such a man as no one should have to ever put up with the terrible abuses he has had to endure. I think he shows tremendous bravery and commitment by stepping up again to offer himself for the position of mayor.


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