Litter Box Woes

Yes, yes, YES, I am going to talk about more bodily functions!
It's been a long week, LONG, and I'm tired. You can tell how tired I am by how crappy my flash was yesterday. It was the worst flash I ever wrote. No, no, don't humour me. I'm just stating a fact. I usually like my flash. Usually am prouder of it than a new momma, but facts is facts, and that flash stunk just like the cat crap all over the house.
I come home tonight, late because of insane work, hoping to get a shoulder rub because everything there is squeezed up tighter than new shoes, and Dave is on the floor.
"What," I say, "are you doing on the floor?"
"Cleaning up cat shit!" says Dave, who doesn't really like cats at the best of times.
Feck, I say to myself. What now.
The cat has diarrhea and has puking all over the house. WTF?? Last night we came home and there was one small incident - tonight it's just disgusting. Dave has cleaned up the house but the cat is still covered. He's waiting for me for that little job. I sigh. I put down my purse and grab the cat. Dave's right. He stinks.
Ever tried bathing a cat?
You might as well bath the Tasmanian Devil. I can barely hold onto him. He bites me. Dave roars because I'm seemingly unable to hold onto the cat. So he holds the cat, harshly, I think, and I am left cleaning the cat's butt. Feck-ity-feck, feck.
"Are you getting it all off?" Dave roars.
"I'm trying!" I roar back.
The cat squeals like a girl.
When the job's done, Dave is all back to normal and I'm pissed off. I don't get over being mad as fast as he does. I just got home, fer crissakes. I just got mad. Gimme a second to not be mad anymore.
I'm mad at someone at work, too. (No, not you L! You always think it's you!) It's someone I don't work with directly, someone I used to really admire, someone I used to get along with really well, and now he's an arrogant arsehole (yes, Mr. Stink Eye) and I'm, like, "what did I EVER see in you???"
Grrrrrr....  Yes, I'm pissy because of the cat.
So, what's wrong with the cat? Anybody got any ideas?
I think he's afraid of his new litter box. Dave brought home one of those covered jobbies and instead of introducing it gradually to our skittish kitty, I grabbed him and stuck him in it head-first. The cat ran away and hid. We also took away both of the older litter boxes.
When I realized I had probably scared the cat, I took the lid off, thinking he would use it like the old ones and get used to it... then we'd put the lid on later. That was a few days ago. I suspect what is going on is the cat has been "holding it" because he's afraid of the new box. Tonight we brought back an old faithful – hopefully he'll see it and everything will return to normal.
Do you think that's it? I mean, I haven't changed his food or anything. He's an indoor cat so it's unlikely he's caught a disease.
I dunno. What do you think?

Oh man, I wrote some of this in the car. Not while driving.. sheesh.. I'm not THAT talented. Now I'm all car sick and pukified.