Wednesday, January 22, 2014
I was just now hanging out at someone else's blog and I read a comment from a commenter, because that's what commenters do, comment, about how she detests movie popcorn butter and can't even finish a tiny bag of popcorn at the movie theatre.
Everyone's entitled to their opinion, of course, but hers is just wrong.
Popcorn is the only reason to go see a movie, especially if it's a bad movie, especially especially if it's Les Miserables, and if you're going to order popcorn, you have to order extra butter, even if it's fakey butter, and if you have to have it layered throughout the ginormously XXXL bag, to the point where it's slimy and the 12-year-old boy behind the counter in the hideous polyester-doubleknit uniform replete with matching hairnet, wants to bitch-slap you.
If you can't finish the entire bag that evening, you eat it for breakfast the next morning.
That is what is Natural and Right and the Way Gawd Intended. People who do not eat popcorn this way are one step away from bestiality and Hell in a Handcart.