Thursday, April 12, 2012

A to Z Honesty - K is for ka-ka

You knew it had to be done, right? Cause what else could K possibly stand for other than ka-ka? The way things have been going around here it was as inevitable as it is obnoxious. So don't blame me if things get stinky.

This post is actually another pearl from my office. I know, you're asking yourself how there could possibly be more information from that office of hers, when yesterday's Belly Button Jam tip was so illuminating? If you knew the people I work with you wouldn't wonder. You should see Angie over there, the imp, always up to no good, laughing so hard she's got tears running down her face. Good thing her mascara is waterproof or she'd be channelling some serious Alice Cooper. It was Angie who suggested ka-ka for the letter K. She's been a big fan of my A to Z series and actually read them out loud to her husband the other night.

"Oh yeah?" said I, inordinately pleased, then throwing my line in the water for a little bit of fishing. "Erm, what did he think?"

"He liked them," she said. "But he fell asleep."

ANYway, so it was Angie who suggested ka-ka which made me acknowledge a startling universal truth: no matter how fancy a meal is, no matter if it was made by Chef Gordon Ramsay or Nigella Lawson, no matter if it's Kraft Dinner or a weenie cooked over a campfire, no matter if it's seen on Food Network or scarfed down straight from the fridge.... it always comes out your "other end" looking like shit.

"The only time it looks different," Angie said, "is if you have corn."

31 comments:

  1. I am so with you on this one. In fact, I wsa just saying to Alan last night about how I am done changing diapers (I have no idea how that topic came up, now that I think about it).

    Also, if this was a baby shower, why were the grandmother etc left behind? With the baby? Does not compute.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. (Wondering why you and Alan were discussing diapers - is there something we should know?????)

      Delete
  2. I was going to go with Ka-Ka for a post but now here you have it. What'a girl to do?
    Ah, babysitting. Fine for an hour but not for more than that. That's why they have their mothers. Ha. Honestly, I wouldn't mind having one visit.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Well if this one gets glommed on to me again, Rubye, I'll send him south.

      Delete
  3. Oh yeah!! I looked after mine, you look after yours.

    ReplyDelete
  4. I'm with ya 100% on the diaper-changing.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Oh, what a fun (and funny) post. I'm with ya on the diaper-changing. Got more than my share of that when our kids were young, so I'm not exactly first in line when one of the grandchildren comes up smelling like the fertilizer in the rose garden. However, before Christmas, our DIL asked us to stay with the younguns while she did some last-minute shopping for our son. Said she wouldn't be gone long, and oh, by they way, she added, Aaron hasn't had a bowel movement in a couple days. Swell. Aaron, the youngest of four, is a bruiser of a boy with a huge appetite who eats copious amounts of fresh fruit. Well, needless to say, he could hardly wait for his mother to leave before he started filling his diaper. Multiple times. Messy, messy, messy. I ended up having to give him a bath. My son and DIL, of course, thought it was absolutely hysterical. Ka-ka indeed.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. OMG! Sorry, Susan, but I'm laughing out loud here. Snorting, even! Poor you. Next time get DIL to give him a good squeeze before arrival and a plug if need be.

      Delete
  6. I really need to set my drink aside when reading your blog...

    ReplyDelete
  7. Ha! Great post. It's official that I'm still a child, because I laughed hysterically at the mere sight of the word "ka-ka." Okay, I just giggled again as I typed it.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hee hee... I knew you were young, Anthony, but not that young! Child progidy novelist, you are!

      Delete
  8. Replies
    1. Thanks Life! It's a good thing you have your helmet on - it'll protect your noggin while you're rolling!

      Delete
  9. omg! Where do you come up with this stuff? I'm checking in every day now so I don't miss a thing.
    karen
    ps, this is so not like Sue Grafton's alphabet!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Not sure it's like anybody's alphabet!!!!! But thanks!

      Delete
  10. Well, I definitely think my son is better looking than a piece of white bread. Oh, and smells better than ka-ka. However, I'm with you on the whole diaper thing. Been there. Done that. Will do it no more.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Although it's hard to be a peanut butter sammich made with fresh, fresh Wonderbread...

      Delete
  11. Years back a friend bought her new(ish) baby to visit. And then offered me the joy of nappy (diaper) changing as a TREAT???? Thanks, but no thanks.

    ReplyDelete
  12. Anyone who can post about ka-ka and mention Alice Cooper in a post is worth a follow ;-)

    Alex

    ReplyDelete
  13. As the mother of nine and grandmother of three... I've done enough diaper duty for THREE women... so I avoid the grandkid diapers when possible as well. I'll do it, yes, but I'm not doing anyone else's either. ;)

    ReplyDelete
  14. Fun (and funny!) stories. Thanks for stopping by for the A-Z.

    ReplyDelete
  15. I hope you weren't writing this post while at work--and if you did, I hope the boss wasn't around.

    Catch My Words
    http://joycelansky.blogspot.com/

    ReplyDelete
  16. Did you ever offer the little nipple-lover to any of its relatives? I figure if grandma won't offer herself, you can always offer the baby to her. It's pretty hard for any good relative to say, "No, I don't feel like loving that yowling monster right now" at a baby shower.

    ReplyDelete
  17. Could you just set him down on the table and say, "I'm done with him now"?

    ReplyDelete
  18. Glad I wasn't eating or drinking anything while reading this. Why wasn't the grandma at the baby shower?

    Susanne
    PUTTING WORDS DOWN ON PAPER

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You are as irreverent as ever and I love it.

      Delete

How's it going, eh? It's SO good to hear from you. Tell me every darn thing...